This doesn't sit right.

Many thanks to the Lone Ranger for bringing this to my attention.

Meet Mr. Pierre Lynch. Doesn't look very happy, does he? I don't blame him, considering he has been arrested for possessing something we all have and, up until now, I wouldn't have thought it was illegal.

But if the headline on the My Fox Website is anything to go by, we're all in big trouble.

"Police: Crack Found In Man's Buttocks."

More accurately, the crack was discovered between his buttocks after an extensive body search by police. And it appears they had a fair idea of what to look for.

So, the crack was found, but who tipped the police off that the crack was there? Was the crack actually Mr. Lynch's, or was he just keeping it safe for someone else?

The latter is a distinct possibility as police stated that they had noticed suspicious activity around the house in which Mr. Lynch was arrested. Could it be the crack didn't fit correctly, causing Mr. Lynch to walk in an odd manner, and thereby giving police reason to believe he was concealing the crack?

Mr. Lynch has also been charged with giving police false information. I can hear it now;

Police: "What's that crack?"

Lynch: "Crack?, What crack?"

Police: "That crack, there. Between your butt cheeks."

Lynch: "Between my ...? Oh wow, man! How the **** did that get there?"

"Police: "Come on, now. You don't expect us to believe you didn't know anything about the crack?"

Lynch: "'God's honest truth, man. I don't know nuthin' 'bout it."

Police: "Wouldn't it be more truthful to say that it's your crack, and you were trying to hide it?"

Lynch: "No way, man! Ain't no way that's my crack. Uh uh. No sir. Must be sombody elses'."

Police: "So, how did it get between your butt cheeks?"

Lynch: "No idea, man. Someone musta put it there when I wasn't lookin'."

Police: "So, what your saying is - and let me get this straight - what you're saying, is someone put that crack in your buttocks without your knowledge. Is that what your saying?"

Lynch: "Yeah! That's it, man!"

Police: "They just snuck up, huh?"

Lynch: "Yeah, dude. Jus' snuck up."

Police: "And put the crack there?"

Lynch: "Sure, man. Like I jus' told you."

Police: "And you didn't notice anything? Didn't feel them putting the crack there?"

Lynch: "Nuthin' man. Hey! They musta had real soft hands, you know?"

Sounds to me like Mr. Lynch was trying to give them a bum steer. However, I'm confident the police will continue to probe the crack angle and eventually get to the bottom of the matter.

Don't look at me like that.